P Diddy's Mother Disowns Him

Today's email contains news, numbers, and opinions that’ll inspire your toaster to start a podcast.

Today’s Number

0 — the number of farts women claim they release daily, apparently.

Business

Frito-Lay, the chip maker, is moving into the computer processor market.

Inspired by Nvidia's success, Lays CEO Walten Vinegar announced the news from the desk of his company’s IT department.

"I've never tasted an Nvidia chip, but the kind of money they're making makes me think the flavors are probably next level."

Stock in PepsiCo, the parent company of Lays, tanked after the announcement.

Man Like Deep, Film Critic

As a professional film critic, I avoid watching films in order to maintain objectivity and prevent bias.

Bias, after all, leads to skewed reviews that lack fairness.

So here are my current picks on both the big screen and television that I’ll probably never watch.

Film

Megalopolis

Director Francis Ford Coppola spent 40 years on this, and it's utter bollocks, apparently. Watch it as soon as possible.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

The Fall Guy

Ryan Gosling cannot save a weak, predictable script devoid of any originality. Catch it while you can.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Television

Buying London

The UK’s version of those glamorous property shows from America have caused emergency rooms across the country to be inundated with patients who have gouged their own eyes out halfway through watching. A must-see.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Celebrities

P Diddy’s mother slammed her son after an old video surfaced of the rap mogul beating then-girlfriend Cassie Ventura in a hotel lobby.

"I've always followed the ‘advertiser's playbook’,” explained Misa Hylton, mother of P Diddy.

“I don’t give a shit to be honest with you, but if the public hates my son, then so do I."

Advertisers are often criticized for shifting their messaging to align with public sentiment, but it’s a strategy that the rappers mother lives by.

“I’m about as pro-trans as you can get these days,” added Hylton. “Pro-trans, and anti-Puffy!”

Image of The Day

Thanks for reading!

Man Like Deep